Another Awkward Week [5.16.14]

Oh my god, you guys. What is even happening? This week simultaneously flew and crawled by. If it were an animal, this week would be some kind of monster breed of like, a snake and a bald eagle...a creature which surely exists in the world of George R. R. Martin...who you can blame when this post is THE worst because I've fiiiinally started watching GOT and am, of course, obsessed. I'm not very good at casually consuming pop culture. When I decide to get into something I go ALL IN. Watching GOT is this weird experience for me because I love to read about pop culture, especially television (I mean books! I always read books and articles about books!) (#employeeoftheyear) and have this weird habit of following recaps and news about shows I've never watched. Like, I have never watched one second of that show Sons of Anarchy and yet I read the Vulture recap every week and know basically every plot point. Same for Homeland! And then I'm like "why am I so busy and stressed?" when really I'm just wasting my time watching TV or reading about the TV I don't watch.

ANYWAY, I don't read the GOT recaps but I do keep up with the news and headlines, it's kind of hard to miss when you spend as much time at Vulture as I do, so I sort of know what happens...but sort of don't. I know the names of a lot of the characters and some major plot points (Red Wedding!) but didn't actually know what all of these people looked like or how they related to one another or when these major plot points actually happened, so every episode I'm like "Oh! Khaleesi!" "The Lannisters!" "Which brother and sister are having an inappropriate sexual relationship?" (Spoiler alert: more than you'd think.)

Do you guys watch this show? It's so good! A smorgasbord of deception and manipulation and war and boobs and murder and boobs and boobs and butts and boobs! All my favorite things. We're about halfway through Season 2 and shit is going OFF. I love it.

Ok I will now stop talking about Game of Thrones...but basically if you're curious what I've been up to all week and why this blog is short, boring and poorly written: blame G.R.R.M! Winter is coming!

Let's take a look at what (else) was keeping it awkward this week.

 

These Permanent Markers:

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With which I was doodling while on a call and oh look they bled through my paper and now I have permanent ink stains on my desk.

This kind of behavior would get you held back from recess in kindergarten.

This Tupperware: 

20140514_172414

It's become sort of a joke with my assistant that she always walks into my office while I'm eating...because I'm always eating.

Funny stuff, I know.

WELL we took the scenario one step further, maybe too far this week when she walked in as I was licking hummus off the lid of my tupperware snack container.

I WISH I could say that was the first and last time I've ever done that but I can not lie to you, my friends. I've done it before and I'll surely do it again.

I should not be allowed out in public.

(Also: my thumb is so disgusting...let this be motivation for me to stop picking at my fingers.  GAH-ROSS, Liz. Gross.)

This Computer Screen:

20140514_172447

Isn't it giant? I KNOW.

So I've been trying to engage myself better in our corporate culture and take advantage of some of the classes and learning opportunities provided by my company. This week I signed up to sit in on a marketing strategy course via Web Ex, which is lingo they did not define in our class...I think it means like, via the internet? I don't even know. Basically, I signed into some program that allowed me to see the deck being presented in the class as well as hear the teachers and other participants speaking. I was also apparently supposed to hook up my phone or some other sort of microphone so I, too, could participate but OBVZ I a) don't know how and b) didn't realize that my computer doesn't just have some kind of built in microphone device.

The class started and the teacher asked everyone to go around and introduce themselves. I waited for my colleague to go before me and then started to chime in "Hello! This is Liz"...and they just kept on breezing to the next person. I waited until the next person spoke and tried again, this time a little louder: "Hello! It's Liz!!!" They didn't hear me. I leaned into the speakers, where the noise was coming OUT and tried to make the noise go IN: "HELLO IT IS LIZ CAN YOU HEAR ME????"

Surprisingly this did not work.

It was basically a parody of a geriatric woman who has just seen her first iPad. 29 going on 90.

PS: do you guys watch Inside Amy Shumer? She is DIVINE and I recommend diving deep into her archives but this particular video is especially appropriate for illustrating this tale. I'm the clueless mom character, of course.

(PS: If you look closely enough you can see all the important tabs I have open: numerous searches for "at home bikini body workouts" (I hate myself), some kind of feminist article (to counterbalance my buying into the idea of a "bikini body") and one tab where I was apparently googling myself. WORKING HARD!)

This Turnstile:

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So last weekend we were in Philadelphia for a wedding, wedding-going is our #1 hobby and pastime these days (after watching Game of Thrones, that is!!!) and while we were there, I got stuck in a subway turnstile.

I, Liz Hohenadel, who rides the subway at least two times per day, sometimes more on weekends, found herself entangled in the metal bars of the turnstile, like some kind of martian who first landed in the deep midwest and then went blind and then visited the Big City for their very first time.

I can't even explain what happened. I put my token in (Philly still uses actual tokens! It's so quaint!) (That sounds demeaning but I mean it in a positive way.) and I walked forward and then the bar got stuck and I stepped back and then I stepped forward again and then I pulled the bar backwards for some reason and then it wouldn't go forwards again so I kept pulling it further back...maybe hoping it would like, do a full 360 and flip me over like a pig on a spit right onto the subway platform? I don't even know.

The woman working at the token booth had to get involved and believe you me...girl was NOT amused. I am going to go out on a limb and guess that working the token booth in the Philadelphia subway system is not exactly full of sunshine and daisies and butterflies, unless those are the names of the homeless men peeing in the corner (it's really not nice to make jokes about homelessness, I know) but this lady DID NOT CARE if I got myself through the turnstile or not and had no plans to help me through.

You know who else had no plans to help me through? OH that's right, BRIAN. You know, my life partner and love of my life who stood there watching me and laughing. Just cracking up, busting a gut laughing while the future mother of his children, woman who irons his shirts for him (not because of gender roles...I'm just better at it) and who is going to walk down the aisle and marry him in exactly 3 months from today (!!!!!!!!!!!!!) got trapped behind bars. I could have died there! And he just laughed! And then, when I finally got through and we made it to my sister's house, announced: "Sorry we're late, Liz got stuck and caused a scene in the subway."

RUDE.

Long story long, somehow I freed myself, the wedding was lovely and I've now ridden multiple subways all week without incident so...good times.

And that, my dear pals, was my week! What have YOU been up to?? Any weekend plans? I'm going to Pittsburgh for...wait for it...wait for it...any guesses... a wedding!! I am SO excited for this one. I mean, I'm always excited for all weddings but this one will be very dear to me. The bride Brigette is Maggie's BFF, they've known each other since they were about four years old, and have been besties ever since and in that time, Brigette has become like a member of our family, coming on vacations, being part of inside jokes, she was even there when we first started calling our mom The Schmoopster. Tomorrow she's marrying this great, great guy and it's just going to be so neat seeing her start this new adventure in her life and I'm so honored to be there. Also starting new adventures: Brian's sister is graduating from college on Sunday! So Brian and I are splitting up this weekend - me to a wedding, him to the graduation, which of course makes me feel weird and guilty and like I'm personally perpetuating the idea that marriage is a more important achievement in a woman's life than an education but I MIGHT need to stop taking myself so seriously and calm it down. Maybe?

BASICALLY it is an exciting weekend for many people who I love so hooray! Let's party. Everybody dance now!

I'm losing it. Have a great weekend, buddies!

xoxo Liz Ho

Welcome to The Dorkyard, Bitch

In this week's 'Holy Shit, I'm Getting Old' news, apparently the television masterpiece The O.C. premiered ten long years ago, making it a full decade since we first heard the phrase: "Welcome to the O.C, bitch!" This fact kind of blows my mind. Where does the time go?!

We already know I had a deep, abiding love for all things Newport Beach (fake engagement to Adam Brody, anyone?) and it turns out I'm not alone. The internet is abuzz with tributes to the show, from The Daily Beast to Grantland to HuffPo...Vulture is even running a full week of O.C. themed coverage. I try not to get too wrapped up in nostalgia, but I can't help getting caught up in the enthusiasm this time.

You see, this show actually holds a deep and special place in my memories. When The O.C. premiered in the summer of 2003 I was in their prime target audience: I'd just graduated from high school and had nothing but time on my hands and a deep interest in all things teen melodrama. The show aired just enough episodes before school started back up to get viewers hooked and upon arrival at college, it quickly became a sort of ice breaker with the girls on my dorm floor.

"Do you watch The O.C.?" someone shyly asked over getting-to-know-you games in the building lobby.

"Oh I do!" I chimed. "Me too!" said another pal. One of the gals invited us all into her room later that night to watch and et voila: a lifelong friendship was born.

We watched every episode together that year, crowding together on the tiny dorm beds or the floor with the neon pillows and blankets that were de rigeur of collegiate interior decor of the day.  I still maintain that the first half of the first season of The. O.C.  is one of the greatest pieces of art ever created. The rest of Season One and some of Season Two are still top notch, before shit really got cray (RIP Marissa!!) but oh, the beginning of that first season, before Oliver came onto the scene, and life was all bagels and Chrismukkah and Captain Oats and Ryan/Marissa sexual tension, damn, you guys, that was some great TV. And not even 'guilty pleasure' watching, either. Just solid, humorous, dramatic, just soapy enough, good TV. 

And whether it was trash or gold, it was a cornerstone of my friendship with my very first college girlfriends, a group which collectively came to be known as "The Dorkyard." Because, you guessed it, we were dorks. And prouddd of it. We were a group of A+ goodie two shoes who all voluntarily lived in the substance free dorms freshman year. We spent most of our weekend nights watching corny TV movies, eating junk food, going to the movies or Barnes & Noble together and loved every second of it. Time has passed and a lot of us have grown up, changed and moved on but I still hold these women in a special place in my heart and consider our years together in The Dorkyard to be some of the most formative and important in my life.

And The O.C. was there through it all.

Allow me to visually illustrate my story here.

After Freshman Year we all parted ways for the summer and came back the following September equally excited to see one another...and the new Season of The. O.C. To celebrate the premier of Season 2 we had a themed viewing party...complete with costumes and virgin cocktails because, well, we're the weirdest.

OC1

Here we are in all of our glory. Clockwise from top left we have Summer Roberts, Kirsten Cohen (me in my blonde days! woof!), Marissa Cooper, Julie Cooper and Anna Stern. You'll note that we're missing some very key characters, namely Seth and Sandy Cohen and Ryan Atwood but, well, it's just not that easy to convince boys to dress up like O.C. characters. Or so I'll have to assume. I'm sure it doesn't take a detective to realize that we didn't really hang out with a lot of boys at this period in our lives.

Who need's 'em! Let's look at more pictures!

OC4

Here we have frenemies Kirsten Cohen and deliciously evil Julie Cooper snarking it up. That drink in my hand is a foreshadowing of Kirsten's upcoming alcoholic spiral, one of the show's low points. Kirsten Cohen will forever be my role model and life hero. I love that women. That said, huge soft spot for old Julie Coops, too. Bad girls are so much more fun.

I just had a memory! I went to an LGBT support meeting in college one time and we all had to go around the room and say our favorite quote from a book or movie or TV and ALL I could think of was a recent episode of The O.C. when Julie seduced Marissa's ex boyfriend Luke and she shows up at his door and says, really dramatically: "Luke, this is a booty call." And so I said that as my favorite quote. WHY! I don't even remember why I thought that was funny AT ALL, I just did. And everyone looked at me like, why are you the weirdest person ON EARTH and proceeded to rattle off inspirational nonsense from like, Shakespeare and Toni Morrison and Shawshank Redemption and all I can come up with is some weird quote about booty calls from a teenage soap opera. Whyyyyyyy!

I never went to another meeting of that club again. I could have made such huge inroads in gay rights by now but I was too embarrassed by how weird I'd been and quit the club. Whomp.

Never not losing the point of the story, am I?

Moving along...

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Romantic rivals Summer and Anna. Who will Seth Cohen pick? The comic book cutie or the unattainable girl of his dreams?!

OC7

And ONCE AGAIN, Marissa Cooper is passed out drunk on the lawn. Will Ryan come to her rescue? Will she finally get her act together and lay off the sauce? Or will she continue on a path of bad decisions (both chemical and romantic), shoot her boyfriend's ex-con brother and eventually die in a fiery car crash, hunky Ryan sobbing over her dead body, while 'Hallelujah' plays in the background?

Ummmmm spoiler alert:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qKYuUzkPHLA]

Oh what a show.

Yes, it ran wildly off the rails and do not get me started on the whole final season where Summer is like, a trustafarian wierdo at Brown and Ryan's in a coma and hallucinating  and what have you, but those first few years, dang they were something special. As were the nights with my college pals -whether we were snuggled up in bed or prancing around dressed as our favorite characters. Memories of the two are linked in my mind as some of the best days of my life.

Did you nerds watch The O.C.? Or do you have any shows/movies/books/albums/etc that are inexorably linked with a particular time and place in your life? I'm always so fascinated by that sort of multi-pronged sensory memory, how for me, hearing a certain Joseph Arthur song (oh those hip soundtracks) or or the word Tijuana ("It's 'tia-huannnnna,' mom, god you are so white") can ship me right back to the early days of college, to the Dorkyard. I'd love to hear what works that way for you!

Aaaand thus concludes my contribution to The O.C.: Ten Years Later archives and, unsurprisingly, it turned out to be a lot less about the show than it was about ME. Shows may come and go but some things never change.

California, here we come!

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i9cCMr1nYcA]

Another Awkward Week [2.1.13]

Oh my god, you guys. 30 Rock is over. My life IS OVER. Just kidding, we still have Netflix and I personally would rather see a show do 6 outstanding seasons before coming to a cohesive, meaningful end while they're still on top, rather than skidding along, a ghost of their former greatness ala the US Office or How I Met Your Mother. Do I care way too much about television? How DARE YOU imply such a thing.

So yes, last night was sad and I'll miss my cast and crew of TGS but life will move on. And when I'm sad, I can always dress up in my Liz Lemon costume and drown my sorrows with sandwiches and off brand cheese puffs:

lizlemon

I spilled sandwich all down the front of my shirt directly after this photo was taken. As true a tribute to Liz Lemon as could ever be imagined.

I went above and beyond prepping food for this party and am now considering a side job where I plan and host TV theme parties. I'm only 12% joking. Would you like to hire me?

Below are a few snaps of the excellent feast I whippped up, and do note this will probably not make sense to you unless you're a 30 Rock fanatic, in which case you can go ahead and scroll to the next segment of the blog,  using that scrolling time to reevaluate your priorities and life choices.

30 rock food

Night Cheese, D'Fwine, Hayum, Teamster Sandwiches and the higlight of the meal: cheesy blasters. And how do you make a Cheesy Blaster, you ask? I'll let Liz explain:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p1W8R5TSNNk]

And that's exactly what we did! Using this helpful recipe here, I took some hot dogs, stuffed them with some jack cheese, wrapped them in a pizza and we had cheesy blasters.

cheesy blasterThanks Meat Cat!

And I'm not even for one second going to pretend they weren't the greatest thing I've ever eaten. See what you're missing, vegans!

And that was my Lemon Party. A delight it was. Now let's leave 30 Rock in our rearview mirror and move on. Here's what else was keeping it awkward this week:

This Chicken Foot:

chicken foot

Because it is a chicken foot and it is just lying (laying? help!) on the floor of the subway. Grotesque. If you were to ask me what I love most about living in NYC I would respond "EVERYTHING!" But then if you were to ask what I hated most, I would say "except rent and chicken feet."

This Hole:

rippppppp

Because it is in my favorite pants and yes that is a picture of my crotch. You're welcome, Mom! She's so proud.

These black stretch jeggings from The Gap were my favorite pair of pants, bar none. I wore them a minimum of four times a week without shame. I look amazing in these pants. They're also about as close to pajamas as you could possibly get without actually wearing Pajama Jeans.

Well, they are no more. Last Saturday I wore these to a Crafting Party at a girlfriend's house (details on THAT to come next week!) and then went immediately out to a nearby restaurant to meet another friend for her birthday dinner. While gathering my things to head to dinner, my crafty friend asked "what do you have between your legs?" The answer, it turned out was absolutely nothing. Just air floating through a gigantic rip just three inches south of my babymaker.

I had two options: go home or find some other pants I could wear out to dinner. My host rummaged up a pair of black leggings that I thought I could rock solo, until someone pointed out that they were completely sheer and sporting a solid control top.

Tights are not pants, girls.

I managed to get my ripped pants on over top of the tights and in the dark of night it was hard to tell what a mess I was but oh, I still knew. Last week sweaters, this week pants.

I could not be classier.

And that's that. A short list, I know but I kind of had my hands full cheese shopping, so please forgive me!

And how was your week? Did you bare your hooty ha for all the world to see? Weep over a comedy TV show? Stuff a hot dog with anything fancy? You know I'd love to hear it.

Anything big planned for the weekend, too? I am going to be a Productive Pamela. I'm going to write (!), file my taxes, go to yoga, go to Trader Joe's and then I guess watch the Beyonce Bowl. I probably won't accomplish half of what I'm setting out to but I'm hoping that by putting my intentions out for the whole internet to see, I will feel guilted into getting shit done lest 'ye judge me lazy. Let's see if it works!

Ok, I'm outta here. Happy weekend, nerds!

xo Liz Ho

Lemon Out!

I come to you with heavy heart today, my friends. Tomorrow night marks the end of an era. At exactly 8 PM Eastern Standard Time tomorrow, January 31st, 30 Rock will light up our television screens for the very last time after six glorious seasons of laughter and joy and friendship and ham. Here's how I'm coping:

(via)

I've had "30 Rock Finale" followed by three frowny faces written on my calendar for months and am celemourning (which is a new word I just made up when you celebrate something sad. Copyright!) by hosting a Liz Lemon Party, and you know what they say:

I'll be in costume as my fave gal (pictures on Friday, I promise!) and I've tried to convince others to come decked out as well. We'll dine upon Night Cheese, Sabor de Soledad and sandwiches. Someone will shotgun a pizza. White wine will be served for the Lemons among us, whiskey for the Donaghy's. It is going to be epic...ally nerdy. Just like La Lemon herself.

Much has been written about Liz Lemon as a character - is she a realistic portrayal of a modern woman? Is she a feminist? Is she hot? - but I won't get into that. For me, Liz Lemon, and by extension her creator Tina Fey, was just great. Plain and simple. Bananas as she was, from the moment Jack Donaghy correctly identified her "type" in the pilot episode, I knew this was my kinda gal:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O4ZFv6jsUMg]

I had big plans to put together my own lengthy retrospective on 30 Rock and what it means to me and how it has shaped the landscape of the future and women and can we have it all and blergh! But no one cares about that. We just want to laugh!

And so, in lieu of my own tribute, I thought I'd share some of my fave links from around the web that other more industrious writers and editors put together to honor the departure of The Greatest Show Of Our Time. Enjoy!

Vulture's 30 Rock Glossary 

Vulture's Illustrated History of Jenna Maroney & Mickey Rourke's Sex Life 

 

Shit Liz Lemon Says video at NBC.com (image via)

Salon's List of The Best 30 Rock Episodes

(Do you agree???)

Liz Lemon's Top 15 Tips for Better Eating via Endless Simmer 

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1l0kGIIW66g]

The Best of Jack Donaghy via YouTube

Annnd that should be enough to keep us all busy for the next two days. So, let's talk! There's no need for any of us to face this impending loss alone. What are your favorite 30 Rock episodes/moments? Do you think you'll cry tomorrow? Are you happy Liz is finally adopting? Favorite characters? Do you prefer sandwiches or pizza? CAN WE HAVE IT ALL???

Lemon Out!

One Awkward Addiction

Sorry I’ve been so MIA, guys. I’ve been really, really busy. I am exhausted. Every night I’m up way past my bedtime (like 10 PM!) and even my weekends are jam packed. It’s rough, but I don’t know what else to do. The TV ain’t gonna watch itself.  

I am on a bender of epic proportions. Over the course of the last 2 weeks I’ve been tearing through a box set of The Wire DVD’s so fast you’d think I'd just been diagnosed with one week til I go blind. Before that started, I crammed all three seasons of Breaking Bad over the course of about the same time period. That is one full month of binging on high-quality, drug-related cable entertainment. Not only has this convinced me that, despite my overabundance of street smarts, ruthlessness and chemistry knowledge, I might not quite have what it takes to be a drug kingpin, it has also forced me to consider a much more serious issue: I am legitimately addicted to watching television.

 

As a connoisseur of television, both highbrow and ABC Family Channel, and a former resident of Bodymore Murderland, many people are surprised to hear I’m just now starting The Wire – a show which is considered by many (or at least this one guy I found on the internet) to be the Greatest Scripted Drama of All Time. The show had long since gone off the air by the time I had access to HBO, but I could have easily gotten my hands on the DVD’s. I stayed away for as long as I could, I knew what would happen. As soon as I got my first taste I’d be hooked.

 

And here we are. Like a true addict, The Wire is all-consuming. I’m either watching or thinking about watching or talking about watching. I have an actual schedule – a schedule! – 3 hours a night on weeknights and as many as humanly possible on weekends. Last Tuesday I went to the gym for the first time in weeks, and quit after 15 minutes on the treadmill because I was worried about making it home in time to watch that night’s scheduled programming. Can’t get behind with these things! On Friday night I stayed in – I told my friends it was to “save money” which actually meant “I have to lay in my dark bedroom and watch 9 hours of this TV show that aired in 2003.” My roommate was also in for the evening and I almost slapped her across the face at the suggestion we watch a movie together. Who does this bitch think she is, trying to keep me away from my TV?!?! She’s a dear friend of mine and we’ll soon be living in separate apartments, and yet I had to literally force myself to sit in the living room and talk to her for ten minutes, convulsing at the thought of what might be happening with the Barksdale crew in the other room. Obvz I’m exaggerating a little bit here, you know I enjoy some hyperbole, but this is barely, barely amped up. I really, really am this obsessed. It is the first thing I think about in the morning and the last thing I think about at night. Suriously. Last night I was laying in bed, and my boyfriend asked what was on my mind (Mom – he was in another twin bed across the room, I Love Lucy style!) and I replied, earnestly, “I’m really worried about Omar.” I was laying awake, on a Sunday night, unable to sleep because I was anxious about the fate of a fictional television character. I know this is my “comedy” blog (HAHAHAH best joke yet!) but this is not me writing a “funny” (the jokes keep coming!) post – this is just a recap of the exciting way I live my life. I think I need some help, y’all!

 

 

I have friends who try to back me up on this – The Wire is just so great, it’s hard to stop, it’s totally normal, etc. These people are enablers! They have no idea what I am capable of. This is hardly my first time down the TV rabbit hole and I’m sure won’t be my last. I used to DVR old episodes of Criminal Minds so I could watch them 8 eps in a row (what would that reveal on my criminal profile, Dr. Reid?!), I all but installed a catheter while watching the BBC version of Skins, god forbid I pause, and pulled an all-nighter watching the first and, tragically, only season of Freaks and Geeks.  I watched the first three seasons of 30 Rock in one lonely weekend, both comforted and horrified to think that was exactly how Liz Lemon might live her life.

 

And, of course, there was the weekend my sister and I first discovered The Vampire Diaries. (Sidenote: Do not even get me started on TVD!  If you are not watching this show, you are seriously cray-cray. I’m not into the whole supernatural vampire situation – we all recall my thoughts on Twilight (woof!) and I really only watch True Blood for the sex, but trust when I say this show is THE TITS. Everyone is sexy and dramatic and it’s bloody and campy and full of high school drama and they’re always having town festivals and flashbacks to Civil War Times and oyoyoyoy it is the BEST! End of sidenote. Now go set your DVR!) We were two young, single gals spending a weekend in NYC. The songs call it The City That Never Sleeps, and that’s just how we lived. I had the first six episodes of the series in from Netflix and after destroying them in one Friday night sitting, we ran to the neighborhood Blockbuster the moment it opened the next morning (RIP, Blockbuster :( ), paid 25 bucks to rent the remaining four discs in the set, and raced back home to watch, stopping only to pick up several BLT's on the way back (TV binges demand grease!) We weren't able to finish that night, so we set an actual alarm clock for 8 AM the next day to be sure we had enough time for the final disc before my sister had to catch a train outta town. It was, and I really wish I was kidding, the pinnacle of my young life.

 

 

I have no real point to this story, I just needed to explain where I’ve been and maybe give a cry for help? Does anyone know if there is a 12-step program for people like me? ‘God grant me the serenity to accept the shows I cannot watch, the courage to watch the ones I can and the wisdom to know the difference.” Ooof, that was both unfunny and offensive! Sorry, everyone!

 

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to run. I foolishly made plans to socialized mid-bender, so now must pretend I’m going to the gym while secretly running home to catch at least one, if not two more episodes, before I meet my pals for a movie. Pathetic, I know. But I’m REALLY WORRIED ABOUT OMAR!