Good news, everyone! I’ve discovered something even more boring than football. Power outages during football games. Are y’all watching the Superbowl? What a disaster! Can these clowns not play in the dark? You know who could handle this mess: The Dillon Panthers and/or East Dillon Lions. Someone get Coach Taylor on the line immediately. Clear Eyes. Full Hearts. Shut this down.
In honor of these lights out shenanigans, here is a partial list of things I find even more boring than football:
- Baseball - Mowing the lawn - The “Jailbird Bates” storyline on Downton Abbey - Moby Dick - Corporate Strategy Meetings - Listening to Jay Leno read the phone book - Bradley Cooper - The Superbowl Commercials 2013 - Church - Slideshows of other people’s vacations - BLT’s without mayonnaise - Listening to commentators speculate about mid-football game blackouts.
BRING BACK BEYONCE!
Ok - So, this game is getting slightly interesting but I'm hitting print so I'll stand by my word: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.