Listen guys, quick placeholder here. I am hard at work on a really thrilling story that started out about bedbugs but might be more about hypochondria but might also be a coming of age tale about a young girl discovering her seuxuality while on safari in the Sudan. That's the thing about writing, you know? Sometimes a whale is just a whale. Sometimes, it's so much more.
At any rate, it's all still too raw to share with the public so instead I'll treat you to some awkwardness I found on the internet: Arthur Recreates Scenes From Classic Movies.
This is my new favorite thing since whatever was my old favorite thing. So Arthur is a baby, you guys, and with the help of his mum he recreates scenes from classic films. So basically what we're working with here is a British baby being humiliated against his will to the entertainment of his charming writer mother. Sign me the EFF up, this is my dream come true. Every Halloween I secretly try to get myself knocked up (JK, Brian, Mom, Everyone) just so I can dress my baby up in absurd costumes. This lady does it every day. MY HERO.
So here is Arthur recreating Alien!
And heeeere's a scene from Jaws which, true confession, I have never actually seen, but I think any and all can agree this is pretty much the best:
How do these fit into the Awkward Universe, you might ask? Allow me to share Arthur Recreates American Beauty:
AHAHAHAH! TOO GOOD. An infant being dressed to recreate a scene in which a disturbed middle-aged man masturbates while imagining a nubile young high school girl nude in the bathtub. Internet, I love you. Arthur's mom, I love you too.
(299 more words down for NaNoWriMo. Getting worse every day. I know.)